do you ever just start thinking about sex and zone out for a couple of seconds and stare into space and then you come back and you’re like ah shit i hope no one realised i was thinking about sex just now
'i am 99% sure the person next to me can read my mind'
IM LAUGHING SO HARD RN I WAS TALKING TO MY CRUSH FROM 5TH GRADE AND WE HAVENT SEEN EACH OTHER FOR LIKE 5 YEARS AND HE WAS LIKE “DID U KNOW I DATED KATY A” IM CRYING I DATED HER TOO WHAT DO I SAY
update i told him i dated her too and he asked me if i was bi and i said yes and he said “oh i am too” and wE DATED THE SAME GUY AND THE SAME GIRL AND NOW WE’RE TALKING ABOUT HOW SEXY DEAN WINCHESTER IS IM GONNA MARRY THIS GUY
six word autobiography: “fuck goddamnit i fucked up so bad”
guys i specifically made that sentence seven words long so someone could comment “but thats seven words” and i could say “fuck i did it again i fucked up” so we could all have a good laugh but no one said it. yall fucked up. i fucked up because i assumed yall wouldnt fuck up. everythings fucked up
i passed these three guys while walking down the ave and one of them called out “you have pretty eyes!” and another one said “have a nice day!” is this the catcalling of the future because i gotta be real im pretty ok with it
HAHAHA HOLY SHIT WE WERE LOOKING AT PICTURES OF SURGERIES IN CLASS AND ALL THE GUYS WERE HOOTING AT THE SLICED BREAST ONES AND THEN THE TEACHER SWITCHED TO A PENIS PIC WHERE IT WAS CUT OPEN AND SOME 300LB JOCK DOUCHEBAG FAINTED RIGHT OUT OF HIS CHAIR BOYS ARE WEAK BOYS ARE FUCKING WEAK